"I noe exactly what to say to break people.
that's why I always choose to shut up.
because what I say always land right at the spot.
it might break ppl beyond repair, or rarely, it will help them improve.
trust me, one day if you piss me off enough,
you'll have a taste of it.
just like how the people tasted it last time."
wanted to post the above passage ytdy but decided not to.
anyway, I'm glad I always choose to shut up.
Because nobody's perfect.
Sorry for letting anger/ disgust cloud my "analysis?" (nt sure if that's the correct word)
after some thots into the whole situation, I finally got you figured out :)
I'm not that mad per se (at least nt anymore), but degrading others to feel better is a BAD BAD way to deal with whatever you are trying to avoid to face.
Hope you get what I've said to you.
Wish you all the best then~ cheers ^^
❥ †r¥ïñg †ö lïvê †hê ß꧆ öµ† ö£ ï† ツ
Monday, March 26, 2012
Sunday, March 25, 2012
birds of the same feather
do you hear yourself talking?
I mean like seriously.
most of the time, I enjoy your company.
but sometimes, you can REALLY DISGUST me.
You talk abt integrity & morals.
Then you talk abt how you would like to violate them.
What are you trying to prove?
That you've got game?
Tell you what, all you proved is your own insecurities.
"sticking with one girl, wouldn't be fun".
oh c'mon, you think it would be fun to stick to u?
it takes more than fun for a relationship to work, if you cant see that,
then God bless you.
Careful.. one day, you might really end up being alone.
what I mean by alone is really alone. deep down soul etching loneliness.
you might have a wife, a family.. but in the end, you'll still be alone.
Why?
because of the choices you made or are about to make.
because you always choose to run away from your confusion.
because you treat PEOPLE like OBJECTS.
because of your own cowardice towards commitment.
because you dont have the guts to man up to the world.
because you dont have the balls to face even the SLIGHTEST POSSIBILITY OF HURT.
birds of the same feather flock together.
I quite pride myself with my guy friends.
Frankly, most of them aint bad :) hahaha.
You are my friend, a dear one at that, but really...
if you continue to be like this, I dun think we can actually 'flock' together anymore.
You need serious help.
❥ †r¥ïñg †ö lïvê †hê ß꧆ öµ† ö£ ï† ツ
I mean like seriously.
most of the time, I enjoy your company.
but sometimes, you can REALLY DISGUST me.
You talk abt integrity & morals.
Then you talk abt how you would like to violate them.
What are you trying to prove?
That you've got game?
Tell you what, all you proved is your own insecurities.
"sticking with one girl, wouldn't be fun".
oh c'mon, you think it would be fun to stick to u?
it takes more than fun for a relationship to work, if you cant see that,
then God bless you.
Careful.. one day, you might really end up being alone.
what I mean by alone is really alone. deep down soul etching loneliness.
you might have a wife, a family.. but in the end, you'll still be alone.
Why?
because of the choices you made or are about to make.
because you always choose to run away from your confusion.
because you treat PEOPLE like OBJECTS.
because of your own cowardice towards commitment.
because you dont have the guts to man up to the world.
because you dont have the balls to face even the SLIGHTEST POSSIBILITY OF HURT.
birds of the same feather flock together.
I quite pride myself with my guy friends.
Frankly, most of them aint bad :) hahaha.
You are my friend, a dear one at that, but really...
if you continue to be like this, I dun think we can actually 'flock' together anymore.
You need serious help.
❥ †r¥ïñg †ö lïvê †hê ß꧆ öµ† ö£ ï† ツ
art of expression
I sux at it.
the art of expression.
I oways find it so hard to express what I really wanna express.
with words, with emotions, gestures. everything. urgh.
it pisses me off sometimes.
I tell people I understand what they are going thru.
I REALLY DO. but I dun think they get that I do.
I have this 'curse' of being clairvoyant? haha.
I'm good at reading people.
I get why they act that way or how they are self-destructing.
(at least I think I get them. )
I want to help them. really.. I do.
part and parcel of being a Christian too maybe?
problem: I dunno how.
telling them might bruise their ego.
not telling them, I feel like I 见死不救. lol.
As a person, we don't like to be transparent in front of ppl.
correct? The irony rite?
We search all our lives for someone who could understand us,
but we are also afraid.
❥ †r¥ïñg †ö lïvê †hê ß꧆ öµ† ö£ ï† ツ
the art of expression.
I oways find it so hard to express what I really wanna express.
with words, with emotions, gestures. everything. urgh.
it pisses me off sometimes.
I tell people I understand what they are going thru.
I REALLY DO. but I dun think they get that I do.
I have this 'curse' of being clairvoyant? haha.
I'm good at reading people.
I get why they act that way or how they are self-destructing.
(at least I think I get them. )
I want to help them. really.. I do.
part and parcel of being a Christian too maybe?
problem: I dunno how.
telling them might bruise their ego.
not telling them, I feel like I 见死不救. lol.
As a person, we don't like to be transparent in front of ppl.
correct? The irony rite?
We search all our lives for someone who could understand us,
but we are also afraid.
❥ †r¥ïñg †ö lïvê †hê ß꧆ öµ† ö£ ï† ツ
life
so the thing with my melaka friends was.. hmm... ok la.
ntg much :) I was kept in the dark about their break up that's all.
Now that we've cleared things up.
Doing great!
that aside, I hate this semester.
omg, feel so stressed and I cant do anything abt it.
time flies so fast.
and I feel so super uber the unproductive.
arhhhh........ God Bless me.
Exam in 2 weeks time, and the sem just started last 2 weeks.
whaooo~ O.O
❥ †r¥ïñg †ö lïvê †hê ß꧆ öµ† ö£ ï† ツ
ntg much :) I was kept in the dark about their break up that's all.
Now that we've cleared things up.
Doing great!
that aside, I hate this semester.
omg, feel so stressed and I cant do anything abt it.
time flies so fast.
and I feel so super uber the unproductive.
arhhhh........ God Bless me.
Exam in 2 weeks time, and the sem just started last 2 weeks.
whaooo~ O.O
❥ †r¥ïñg †ö lïvê †hê ß꧆ öµ† ö£ ï† ツ
Wednesday, March 14, 2012
bitter tears
after being settled about one thing, another thing pops up.
seriously? What did I do wrong worh?
I feel boycotted la. dafuq whey.
If I did something wrong tell me la..
If it's about the trip to Sabah,
then I guess my biggest mistake was to have you all over.
This is beyond unappreciated man!
I'm so speechless.
Am I being paranoid? cz u guys kinda ketara lorh.
the fuck.
Almost 2 years de friends, so yeah, this hurt damn a lot.
I honestly feel left out and insignificant. Like I'm invisible. Yah noe?
Do you noe how much it hurts? I hope I'm just paranoid and all these will go away.
and there I thought, I've made great friends.
seriously, I hate Peninsula SO SO SO SO much.
the people, the places. everything.
I wanna go back to Sabah, I just want to go back in time.
Back to the days with my REAL TRUE friends in LokYuk.
❥ †r¥ïñg †ö lïvê †hê ß꧆ öµ† ö£ ï† ツ
seriously? What did I do wrong worh?
I feel boycotted la. dafuq whey.
If I did something wrong tell me la..
If it's about the trip to Sabah,
then I guess my biggest mistake was to have you all over.
This is beyond unappreciated man!
I'm so speechless.
Am I being paranoid? cz u guys kinda ketara lorh.
the fuck.
Almost 2 years de friends, so yeah, this hurt damn a lot.
I honestly feel left out and insignificant. Like I'm invisible. Yah noe?
Do you noe how much it hurts? I hope I'm just paranoid and all these will go away.
and there I thought, I've made great friends.
seriously, I hate Peninsula SO SO SO SO much.
the people, the places. everything.
I wanna go back to Sabah, I just want to go back in time.
Back to the days with my REAL TRUE friends in LokYuk.
❥ †r¥ïñg †ö lïvê †hê ß꧆ öµ† ö£ ï† ツ
Monday, March 12, 2012
自欺
如果自欺可以让自己好过一些， 你会吗？
人总是喜欢活在谎言之中， 因为只有这样才会感到所欲的幸福和安全。
坚持面对事实可以很痛苦，
坚持不活在谎言之中， 真的不是想像中的简单容易。
今天塔飞机回马六甲，
想了很多很多。
在飞机上的心情有一点乱，
心里话到底是什么？自己也变地模糊了。
是心碎还是遗憾和不舍呢？
I really thought I was fine.
In KK, had heart to heart talks with CJV n Hailing.
But when I felt like I wanna tell them about it, I suddenly realised I had ntg to say at all.
Only then I realised I had blocked the whole incident out of my head.
My brain has yet to process it.
As of now, I feel okay :)
The agony is temporary gone because I've found my ground.
Before this, it was so torturing because I dunno where I stand,
what I want, what is real and what is unreal.
The truth is as real as you let it be, I guess.
Thank you for letting me go? Now I shall work hard to do the same.
You are a very precious friend :)
my stand is that I dont want to lose you.
It's amazing I guess..
How we can just talk n chat like ntg ever happened.
Like how we were long ago.
Thank you for today.
Thank You for everything, always <3
❥ †r¥ïñg †ö lïvê †hê ß꧆ öµ† ö£ ï† ツ
人总是喜欢活在谎言之中， 因为只有这样才会感到所欲的幸福和安全。
坚持面对事实可以很痛苦，
坚持不活在谎言之中， 真的不是想像中的简单容易。
今天塔飞机回马六甲，
想了很多很多。
在飞机上的心情有一点乱，
心里话到底是什么？自己也变地模糊了。
是心碎还是遗憾和不舍呢？
I really thought I was fine.
In KK, had heart to heart talks with CJV n Hailing.
But when I felt like I wanna tell them about it, I suddenly realised I had ntg to say at all.
Only then I realised I had blocked the whole incident out of my head.
My brain has yet to process it.
As of now, I feel okay :)
The agony is temporary gone because I've found my ground.
Before this, it was so torturing because I dunno where I stand,
what I want, what is real and what is unreal.
The truth is as real as you let it be, I guess.
Thank you for letting me go? Now I shall work hard to do the same.
You are a very precious friend :)
my stand is that I dont want to lose you.
It's amazing I guess..
How we can just talk n chat like ntg ever happened.
Like how we were long ago.
Thank you for today.
Thank You for everything, always <3
❥ †r¥ïñg †ö lïvê †hê ß꧆ öµ† ö£ ï† ツ
Friday, March 2, 2012
tequila shots
hmm, I've got so many bruises on me >.<
from the hard core playing for the past few weeks!
well, i'm proud of them :D
but when i say "bruises", the thing that comes to mind is "EGO".
yes, my ego was bruised. it still is..
maybe some part of me really couldnt face the fact that I've lost the game.
I couldnt accept that I was played.
hmmm....
but for most part, I couldnt accept that people knew that I was played?
I felt exposed and seriously 'BRUISED' when pokey they all found out on fb.
haish. I couldnt take it. I left the group and walked arnd alone.
I almost cried.
however, telling myself it was ego hurting and not entirely the feelings,
it did make me feel A LOT better. LOL.
anyway~
M playing with fire here.
We kept a bit of contact..?
I wanted to play more. a defence tactic perhaps?
to perhaps give myself back some selfworth?
I feel the need to get back at him.
yuan lai, my ego problem so kinyao de... O_O
gosh, why am I so complicated? lol.
in the end, it would still be me who gets hurt rite?
❥ †r¥ïñg †ö lïvê †hê ß꧆ öµ† ö£ ï† ツ
from the hard core playing for the past few weeks!
well, i'm proud of them :D
but when i say "bruises", the thing that comes to mind is "EGO".
yes, my ego was bruised. it still is..
maybe some part of me really couldnt face the fact that I've lost the game.
I couldnt accept that I was played.
hmmm....
but for most part, I couldnt accept that people knew that I was played?
I felt exposed and seriously 'BRUISED' when pokey they all found out on fb.
haish. I couldnt take it. I left the group and walked arnd alone.
I almost cried.
however, telling myself it was ego hurting and not entirely the feelings,
it did make me feel A LOT better. LOL.
anyway~
M playing with fire here.
We kept a bit of contact..?
I wanted to play more. a defence tactic perhaps?
to perhaps give myself back some selfworth?
I feel the need to get back at him.
yuan lai, my ego problem so kinyao de... O_O
gosh, why am I so complicated? lol.
in the end, it would still be me who gets hurt rite?
❥ †r¥ïñg †ö lïvê †hê ß꧆ öµ† ö£ ï† ツ
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