Masked.

I don't like this. This void of feeling.
This feeling of not having someone to like.
This feeling of giving up.

I'm angry at myself.
I'm angry that I couldn't express myself.
I'm angry that it still hurts.
I'm angry that I still have middle child syndrome.
I'm angry that I still couldn't trust.
... that I still cannot open up myself.

When will this defence mechanism fail?
When can I talk about my family without tearing?
When can I find someone to confide in?

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