Monday, January 16, 2012

a small confession

I'm in a lot of pain.
self-induced? I have no idea.
Not everything is the way that it seems.

it's not that I don't look for people to get help.
it's just always bad timing.
I've got this very big thing to tell mum.
I have to.
But I really am not ready.
I noe it's my fault.
I noe it was stupid.
I noe how she would react.
I noe I am hoping that she wouldn't react that way.
what I dunno is if I can take her reaction.
whichever it may turn out to be..
be it anger, when words can hurt A LOT...
be it understanding, when those feeling of relief and guilt sets in...

I really dunno how to face her.
All I can do now is hide?
but the fear is eating me up from inside.
God, I'm truly sorry, so please just answer my prayer & help me through this.

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1 comments:

Jun said...

what had happened? keep writing, don't keep inside yourself, it's very 辛苦.. i hope i don't stress you out. i shall just be a listener or reader if you want to keep it k? may God bless you my friend